Ooh La La! Paris's iconic and risque Crazy Horse cabaret lands in London

Ooh La La! Paris's iconic and risque Crazy Horse cabaret lands in London - The iconic Crazy Horse – often referred to as Le Crazy – which has been seducing audiences in Paris and Vegas for over 60 years is for the first time ever staging a production on this side of the Channel.

Forever Crazy is a contemporary  glamorous 'best of' show housed in a pop-up recreation of the Parisian venue – essentially a super-luxe tent – on London's South Bank, for just three months.

The avant-garde revue features a cast of ten dazzling dancers from around the world. 

The Crazy Horse has landed in London and it's sexy, fun and very risque
The Crazy Horse has landed in London and it's sexy, fun and very risque
The girls are a glossy, statuesque fantasy and different from beautiful women you see day to day. 

They are sublime physical clones of one other with pert curves, sharp, muscular definition and arched backs that form perfect semicircles. 

They're classically trained dancers and former ballerinas so the signature Crazy way of walking, dancing and behaving: sexily, elegantly, as if weightless and effortless is something they portray with perfection.

But it's not easy.

Each 90 minute show is exactly the same and consists of 14 sensual segments with a 20 minute interval, which you'll need to catch your breath. 

The girls rotate to dance the solo performances, so each one is signature to all. 

When Forever Crazy invited the FEMAIL team to come down we jumped at the opportunity. 

The girls are a glossy, statuesque fantasy and different from beautiful women you see day to day
The girls are a glossy, statuesque fantasy and different from beautiful women you see day to day
Past guest performers include Carmen Electra, Immodesty Blaize, Dita Von Teese and Pamela Anderson. 

Demi Moore learned the ropes for Striptease by watching the Crazy. This was not one to be missed.

We were first treated to a twist on marching Coldstream Guards in God Save Our Bareskins; an army of snappy and seductive 'guards' in Bareskin outfits consisting of a tall fur hat and not much else. 

Although this act has actually opened every Crazy show for the past 30 years it was also a fitting welcome for a British audience. 

Crazy Horse manager Andrée Deissenberg has since told me this routine was choreographed by a lieutenant of the British Army.

There was a lot of impossibly elegant writhing on furniture in Leçon d¿érotisme, Rougir De Desir and Purple Underground 
 
There was a lot of impossibly elegant writhing on furniture in Leçon d¿érotisme, Rougir De Desir and Purple Underground
There was a lot of impossibly elegant writhing on furniture in Leçon d’érotisme, Rougir De Desir and Purple Underground
The music was fiery, wild and rocky in Chain Gang where a dancer – the embodiment of a caged feline – bathed in a leopard-print projection cavorts in a makeshift bendy cage: frustrated, dangerous and sexy. 

What followed was a brilliantly kooky leg display in Legmania: like something out of a Robert Palmer video in the 80s six girls lie down, legs in the air and perform a synchronised show with kicks, flicks and bends, bathed in lights, wearing Louboutins of course.

Talented hand dancing guest performers Up & Over It stole the show with their depiction of a dishevelled young couple in a drink and drug-fuelled post-party row played out with no words yet conveying a witty, gritty yet playfully warm narrative.

Thoroughly modern pieces shone among the oldies such as Crisis? What Crisis!
Thoroughly modern pieces shone among the oldies such as Crisis? What Crisis!

What followed was a brilliantly kooky leg display in Legmania
What followed was a brilliantly kooky leg display in Legmania

There was a lot of impossibly elegant writhing on furniture in Leçon d’érotisme, Rougir De Desir and Purple Underground. 

Thoroughly modern pieces shone among the oldies such as Crisis? What Crisis! – depicting a trader engaging in the only striptease from full clothing to nudity, a self-styled antidote to the misery of the financial crisis – and Scanner, a quintet of hair-flipping hotties each taking their turn to cut a rug while a stealthy horizontal light moves up and down the stage.

Critics call the Crazy sexist while their owners prefer 'exotic ballet' and 'sensual striptease'. While unlike traditional burlesque it's more erotic than flirtatious, it follows the rule of suggestion rather than explicitness. Although the girls perform mainly in the nude you won't really see them naked.

They're 'dressed' in stage lights, projections and mirrors, leaving some work to the imagination. 

Unfortunately, though, while they're fiesty and expressive they're mute. The girls mime along to some songs and it would have been nice to hear at least one sing live. It seems the point is not to get to warm to their characters but just to witness them in overt sexual expression.

Nevertheless this didn't take away from an awe-inspiring spectacle. 

The Crazy remains a legendary institution in its own right and the epitome of slick and triple-filtered cabaret interlaced with the world of fashion and art. 

While unlike traditional burlesque it's more erotic than flirtatious
While unlike traditional burlesque it's more erotic than flirtatious

Thousands of girls apply for the roles but only a select few are chosen and sent to boot camp
Thousands of girls apply for the roles but only a select few are chosen and sent to boot camp
The lips sofa in Leçon d’érotisme is inspired by the one masterminded by Crazy fan Salvador Dali. Andy Warhol also frequented the show, as did Madonna, Prince, Jean-Paul Goultier – in whose show the girls have walked, David Lynch – for whom they've modelled, Steven Spielberg and many more, including President Kennedy.

Thousands of girls audition each year for just a handful of spots in the Crazy Horse troupe.
The successful candidates must be beautiful and meet strict height, wight and measurement criteria. They're sent to a Parisian boot camp for several months to learn the art of how to be a Crazy Girl, their names are changed. 

They must have next to no tattoos or plastic surgery (guest perfromers are an exception).
It's this rigour and refinement that separates the Crazy from the dribbly Playboy or its jiggly neighbour, the Moulin Rouge. It's as much a cool celebration of high-production as it is of an ideal of femininity. ( dailymail.co.uk )

The Crazy Horse presents Forever Crazy at 99 Upper Ground, South Bank SE1. Sept 18-Dec 22. forevercrazy.co.uk

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